If I was a pirate

If I was a pirate I would eat candy. I would chew gum. I would get lots of surprises. I would play checkers. I would play chess. I would have a gun. I would take out the garbage. I would have a snack. I would eat pirate soup. I would shoot. I would swab the deck. I would have a sword fight. I would drink Captain Morgan spiced rum. I would swim. I would find other pirates. I would take out my golden teeth and feed it to a scary sea creature. I would have another pirate to come under water with me and look for a scary sea creature. I would tie a scary sea creature up when its out of the water. I would paddle in a canoe. I would have lunch. I would have dinner. I would see what's in my treasure. I would have a party. I would dance. I would go see an r rated movie in theatres with a little bit of other pirates. I would steal from other people in boats.